Thursday, October 28, 2010

Friends are like bras...close to your heart and there for support

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to spend time with a friend who needed my help.  Being able to serve someone in need creates such a wonderful, warm feeling and establishes a unique bond between you.

Even more amazing is finding out you have helped someone and didn't even know it!

In the past year of teaching Zumba fitness classes, I feel like I have acquired so many new friends.  They are not just class members or students to me.  When I see their smiling faces walk in through the door, it is like a friend coming to my home to visit me.  I am honored that they want to come.

In all the years of teaching a variety of fitness classes, I  have never experienced the phenomenon of what has happened teaching Zumba fitness.  I began teaching Zumba because I truly enjoyed how fun it was.  I was impressed with how quickly inches and weight could come off.    I just wanted to share the physical benefits of that with everyone.  I never imagined the greater emotional impact  it was having on many of my new friends and with myself.

So many of them have shared their personal stories with me. Struggles with divorce, terminal illness, loss of a child, deep depression, physical limitations, pregnancy issues, teenager conflicts.  The reason for sharing their stories with me was because coming to our Zumba fitness class  made a difference during a difficult time in their lives.  A couple of times a week, they could look forward to something happy when they felt the rest of their life was falling apart.   I was totally unaware that our classes were providing anything else but a chance to work out.
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There have been several  cherishing moments with women  that just a few months ago were unknown to me and now have touched my heart.  As a new face walks into my class, not only do I want them to enjoy being there, I want that person to be able to feel the support the rest of us have been experiencing. I want them to feel the happiness from 'coming to my home'

Saturday, October 16, 2010

What's Good for the Goose...

I am staring  at the broccoli, green salad and vegetable medley on my plate (all of which I like) and the thought occurred to me, "How come I don't crave vegetables?"  Think about it... most of us like at least some vegetables and we know how to make them tasty and appetizing, but the reality is that the food that is not that good for our bodies is what we crave the most.

My particular leaning is towards chocolate and Diet Dr. Pepper (Regular is too sweet) with lots of ice. My husband craves salty things like potato chips or homemade fries.

Sometimes I yearn for a great grilled steak or in the summer, sweet watermelon.  I have yet to have my mouth water over spinach greens or have a late night snack attack for carrot sticks. But vegetables are low in carbohydrates, rich in vitamins and immensely good for our bodies.

 A diabetic usually has to watch their carbohydrate intake in order to control their blood sugar levels.  Blood sugar levels rise  when carbohydrate intake is high.  Excess insulin is released to counteract the increase in blood sugar so now the diabetic has a problem because their body doesn't handle the excesses well.
My obese mother became a diabetic when she and my Dad came to live with me and mom had several strokes.  I had to learn how to cook and feed her to keep the diabetes under control.  I had to 'count' carbohydrates for her meals & snacks and restrict her intake of them.  Per serving: Meat =0 carbohydrates, Vegetables =5, Dairy= 12, Fruit =15, Breads, grains, pasta, rice, legumes & starchy vegetables (like potatoes, corn & peas) = 15.

In other words, meat & vegetables had to make up most of the meal and small amounts of the other to keep it balanced.  Mom lost 100 lbs in one year.  She went from 280 lbs to 180 lbs.  Of course that was because she used a wheelchair or a walker.  Hard to sneak into the kitchen for chocolate chip cookie theft when someone else has to lift you from your chair.

My Dad used to sit at his desk and hide a Symphony chocolate bar where mom couldn't see it from her lazyboy chair.  Mom may have lost some use of her limbs, but her hearing was excellent.  She could hear that foil wrapper peel slowly away from the chocolate as Dad tried to quietly sneak a taste.  She would quickly ask him what he had hiding over there and to come give her a piece.  He had given in to her too many times and suffered my worried scolding so he learned to pretend his hearing aid was off.

I have pretty good use of my appendages and those darn digits reach for chocolate  when the craving comes on.  So I look at those vegetables and sigh.  They're okay and I will eat them because I know I need them, but  I wish they tasted like Lindor Truffles.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Attitude, Scmatitude...

I saw an old acquaintance not too long ago who has always been beautiful looking.  She takes care of herself; hair always done nice, nails polished, cute clothes, exercises consistently to keep slender, has always been physically fit.   We talked for awhile before she told me she was now divorced.  To look at my friend one might be surprised to find her husband had left her after 25 years of marriage.  One might even be shocked to find her husband had left this pretty woman for a much heavier, plainer woman.  I wasn't too surprised.  Why?

This friend of mine has always had a negative perspective about herself.  Her body was never 'skinny' enough, hair wasn't cut right (when you complimented her on it) she told everyone she wasn't talented or smart.  She was always putting herself down  in front of family and friends. She would tell her husband she didn't know why he married her, he must not love her because she wasn't good enough, pretty enough or skinny enough.  Although physically fit, she doesn't seem to be emotionally 'fit'.

 I think we are all guilty of being negative about ourselves and not acknowledging the compliments given to us.  Is it our human nature to put ourselves down  and not believe others when they tell us something good?
I think not...I think we   kind of practice the negative communication until it becomes a bad habit and weakens our 'fit' state.

When we were children we had a pretty high estimation of ourselves.  I love the comment one of my 'adopted' grandchildren gave me, "Nana, I am a beautiful princess and really nice, too.  My daddy says my lips will drive boys crazy someday".  She's absolutely correct!  She's beautiful, nice and has gorgeous full lips. Right now she has a pretty 'fit' image of herself.  I hope it never falters.

Our overall fitness includes how we feel about ourselves. Just as our muscles become more shapely and attractive with effort, so can our attitude and demeanor.  Working on a having a more positive self image and happy outlook  attracts others to you.  It promotes both your emotional and physical health.
We  enjoy being in the presence of someone who is cheerful and positive.  We avoid the company of  those with negative attitudes. Simple...
The husband married a woman who had a sunny disposition and positive view of herself and her trials in life.Although not physically fit, internally she was fit.

This experience causes me to question.. what am I doing to become more 'fit' emotionally?  Am I the kind of person whose attitude  attracts or repells  others?  What can I do to improve?

Truly, we are all beautiful and really nice, too...we just need to believe it and show the world we are.

Yo-Yo-Years

From chubby child to  adulthood, my clothing size has always fluctuated. My husband complained that he never knew what  size to buy me because my clothing ranged from a size 6 - 26.  Ouch. (I just told him not to bother buying me clothes, it would just depress me if he guessed wrong) 
I think my closet(s) represent what most normal women experience.  One closet for the clothes that fit us now, another (or a big box) for the clothes that we swear we will fit back into someday and possibly a few larger pieces for those "fat" days.  It seems much easier to toss the larger size apparel than to give up the smaller sizes that don't fit anymore. It's like admitting defeat to let go  of the single digit size.

For years I kept a box of smaller sized clothes that I wore during college days.  A black & cream angora sweater that I adored,  a pair of hot pink Yves St. Laurent pants that I bought while at BYU-Hawaii. After twenty years I finally opened the box - nothing fit of course, but my daughter was able to wear some of them for 80's day at high school (the stinger came when she innocently commented, "you used to be THIS skinny?!")  There was a very satisfying moment when my daughter needed a  classy suit for the Jr Miss Pageant and I pulled out a 20 year old  size 8 expensive cream suit I had stored (you know...just in case....) It was a little snug on her but she was able to wear it. Saved me at least $100.  And guess what?  It hangs in my closet right now... (Scroll down for Yo-Yo photos)

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Beginnings

What woman hasn't worried about her weight, how she looks in her clothes, whether she feels good about herself?  Constant magazine sales with those type of headlines can attest to the legitamacy of those concerns.
Concerns that have dogged me most of my life.  This year I turned 50 years old.  In doing so I have discovered that my fitness thought processes have evolved. They have turned from what the scales and mirror say  to lean more towards how strong I feel, is my body functioning better today,  are my emotions happy and stable?  Perhaps it is the wisdom of middle age, a wider scope of insight from all the years of success  or  failure to control my weight, exercise consistently and battle genetic depression.

I have always admired  and secretly resented those who have never struggled with their weight.  To watch a woman age and stay slim even after several pregnancies is awe-inspiring and mind torture at the same time.
I  struggle to  emotionally connect with someone my age who has never experienced the dismay of being overweight or obese and the despair that no matter what you try, your weight yo-yo's and the perception of yourself is one of little value.

When you suffer difficulties in your life and find someone who has experienced like trials, you feel a kinship, a bond of understanding and a great comfort that you are not alone in this struggle.

Even though there are great and/or famous 'fitness experts' out there, if they haven't struggled with weight issues (which piggybacks with emotional issues) there just isn't a true feeling of trust that can be established between us.  They may  have fitness knowledge and education but not the deep compassion and  empathy that comes with the shared understanding of what you are truly going through. 
It is that type of understanding plus my years of fitness experience and training that I have to offer those who struggle as I always have. Caring and sharing on this path I have chosen...